Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
I was born with a shot glass in my hand
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
I told my boss that I'm in a slutty stage of my life right now and the chef overheard and slipped me his number. I might get laid tonight
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
Randomize
