She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
Just pee around me
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
last night I mixed vodka in with my protein shake... and you tell me my new years resolution was impossible
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