dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
Dude, she set my Tinder preference to men, set the radius to 100 miles, and used up all of my right swipes. I think she's mad.
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
Randomize
