Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
If I don't at least start a parade that spirals into drunken riots then I'm calling it a fail of a birthday
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
You grabbed my arm, said "I need you" in a very concerned voice and dragged me to the other room where you were blasting Evolution of Beyoncé.
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
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