I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
Randomize
