Ambien. No doubt about it.
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Randomize
