remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
Randomize
