My brain says no but my pants say off.
She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
Randomize
