We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
EMERGENCY FRIEND CRISIS: WE HAVE TOO MUCH WHISKEY. ABORT HANGING OUT WITH MELISSA, RECOMMEND TO HANG OUT WITH OUR WHISKEY INSTEAD
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
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