Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
Reggie can tackle my bush.
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
This morning on my way to work I saw a guy ride his bike straight into a woman and her dog while trying to light a bowl. Thought of you.
sorry there isn't a 'perfect ass' emoji
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
Randomize
