Why is half of me covered in green stuff that won't come off?
You stripper-danced on a light pole in the quad. It had fresh paint on it.
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
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