WTF. you left me with no condoms and you ate all my mac and cheese. scumbag.
I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
Randomize
