Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
im taking a nap outside. wake me up in an hour.
way to go to work and not wake me up. when you get home youre rubbing me with aloe and giving me a blowjob. no excuses
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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