we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
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