my room smells like sperm. sweet.
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
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