Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
Randomize
