forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
This gyro tastes like lonliness
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
Randomize
