Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
Don't talk to me about lonely until you're eating marshmallows for dinner in your underwear watching House of Cards for 12 hours straight. I hate all you couples
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
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