so that wasnt chicken after all
did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
i actually just woke up with a lampshade on my head. god damn cliches.
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
I should never bitch about not getting laid. He's begging me to come over and I'm saying no because I'm watching a Golden Girls marathon.
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
Walking into my bedroom & smelling stale sex & disappointment isn't how I envisioned being 39, in case you were wondering.
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
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