haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
My drunk dialing habit needs to go. My drunk habit can stay though.
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
When you're trying to sneak from the bathroom to your room with dildo, but it glows in the dark and suddenly your entire life is illuminated in the shape of dick
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
Couch. On fire.
Randomize
