Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
My mom's mothers day present consisted of a card, chocolate and the rose bush I threw up in as I was getting in last night. She loved it.
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
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