its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
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