hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
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