Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
Randomize
