i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
My body has become completely dependent on Text Twist. I can't poop without it.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
Randomize
