Rocking a Headband at the strip club, because of Rock of Love this shit is like their kryptonite, I smell like stripper butter and back child support.
so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
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