we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
I lost my vibrator temporarily and for some unknown reason my first thought was that you might have stolen it. But then I realized you would never do that because you know it keeps me from killing people. But I am overtired and lacking in faith.
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
Randomize
