Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(516): View more from New York

gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long

(917): View more from New York City

Thats what she said

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(610): View more from Pennsylvania

if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs

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(732): View more from New Jersey

You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked

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(603): View more from New Hampshire

You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"

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(714): View more from California

He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.

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(860): View more from Connecticut

no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.

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(509): View more from Washington

first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.

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(269): View more from Michigan

I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.

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(815): View more from Illinois

What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.

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