Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
I fed the cats at 7 am, made her eggs, gave her oral, and now I'm helping her clean and baking her brownies. Cosmos got nothing on me.
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
Can you repeat that, but with context?
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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