Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
she was so wasted that she tried to tuck me in and read the jokes on the taco bell sauce as a bed time story
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
I'm way too hungover for life right now
You know it’s going to be a rough day when you scream “Get fucked” at your alarm clock
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
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