I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
You came home with a traffic cone and said, "this is my birthday condom."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
Okay, I just reached peak living alone
I ate a piece of chocolate cake while jerking off
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
I came so hard my ears popped.
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