you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
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