Just tried calling my phone on my phone because i thought i lost my phone.
sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
Randomize
