And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
I'm microwaving a frozen bottle of Two Buck Chuck while watching The Proposal with my housemate. I'm not sure what success is like, but I'm fairly confident this isn't it.
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
There's even glitter on my cock...
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