chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
she said she wouldn't go home with me until she looked up my name in her sex offender app. do i really give off that vibe?
Yeah. It's not just the beard either.
I broke my foot jumping out of YOUR window under YOUR watch. You failed me drunk guardian. You failed.
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
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