We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
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