Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
OH MY GOD I AM DYING. AS I WAS TEXTING I JUST BUMPED INTO A MOTHER FUCKING DEER. I AM SHAKING
Wait...Literally? You hit a deer...with your body?!
I PHYSICALLY RAN INTO IT. I FELT ITS WEIRD HAIR AND I EVEN APOLOGIZED CAUSE IT DINDT REGISTER THAT IT WASNT A PERSON. MORTIFIED.
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
Randomize
