HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
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