Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
It says a lot about the way my life is going right now that 'there's no shit in your house' is fucking good news.
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
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