she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
I can feel your judgement through the phone
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
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