we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
Sober December ended when I found beer behind my bed...I lost $2000 but spent 6 hours sober. Meet me at the bar?
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
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