I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
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