Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
Randomize
