Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
If it wasnt for my iphone and loopt, I would still be wandering the streets in a drunken stooper. Thanks Steve Jobs.
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
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