Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Randomize