No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
Randomize
