there is a puppy in the bar... no really i didnt steal this one
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
you know what scares the shit out of me? i have eaten bagel bites since i was a little kid and just in the past five years they started puting "made with real cheese" WHAT THE FUCK WERE THEY USING BEFORE? i mean ive been a bagel biter since the womb
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
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