You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
I saw a kid peeing outback so I yelled "you have a small pecker, but its ok cuz when life gives you lemons..." and proceeded to throw lemons at him
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
Randomize
