your parents love me but you hate me
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
If I ever say "I'm never drinking again" just hand me a bottle of jack. I'll snap out of it.
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
Randomize