Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
So...no?`
can u get pink eye on your cock?
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
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