do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
Randomize
