he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
She called me her guardian angel after I picked her phone up from the river of pee coming from her front porch.
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
I can now recognize that when my wine bottle reaches a certain point, I probably shouldn't tweet, text or call anyone. RESPONSIBILITY
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
Randomize
